I won’t be satisfied with anything ordinary

In the midst of the Syrian refugees and the ISIS attacks, I have found a change in myself!

First of all, everyone who is suffering right now is much more important than what I am going through, but it is these events that God has partly used to tug on my heart.

I am a slight chicken, as well as a home body. Thus, being away from home for too long usually ends with me crying my eyes out and being without some of the comforts of the American world (toilets, microwave, ice, etc.) leaves me pretty uncomfortable and miserable so perhaps take what I am about to say with a grain of salt.

That being said, you wouldn’t think of me as someone who could go live in another country far away from friends and family, and honestly, I might not be. But in the words of a truly wonderful woman of Christ (my mentor and friend) there has started to be a stirring within me.

It’s almost impossible to explain it to anyone. Essentially through my process of raising financial support and depending on God more than ever (His doing, not mine), I have found myself abandoning all my own hopes, dreams, and ideas. I don’t want to live this life doing what I want to do, but what He wants! And because I think, many people do not fully feel this way yet, I feel called to and obligated to do something BIG, or should I say challenging for Him.

How does this connect with Syria and ISIS? Simply this, God placed me in a missionary family, God provided me with international friends, God called me to mission work…. could He not be preparing me for something else?


Here comes a possibly offensive statement. I’m tired of living in the American bubble. Its not that America is bad, or that others are living in this bubble, but that I feel like I can’t sit around doing an office job for the rest of my life while SO many suffer.


I want to sell out to Christ. I want people to look at me like I’m crazy.

And now for the title of this post. These are words from the song, Open Up the Sky by Deluge. I won’t be satisfied with anything ordinary, not for you Lord.


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